Been a hell of a day..
A hug would be nice..

Miss you..

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Since this is going be my yelling bin i might as well do as i pleased? yes?

*sigh....
Today was... abit dull.. as it has been for the past years.. and being in the most depressing country in the world doesn't help either .. :D

28.06.05
People find it as a lucky date.. others unlikely..
For me.. that was the day it all begin..
The day I knew him..

A bizzare thing that turns into few years of endless waiting.
Yes.. I've done it.. again?
Inside, I am a pathetic woman with a very low self esteem as it appears to be..
I fooled them all!

1427 days
Big number of days... to wait until the day you meet with somebody you love?

why does it take that long?
I .. Don't know.. I've been asking the exact same thing for the last 1427 days
No wonder he got sick of it..

As for me...
It was a thrill for the first 3 months.. as all newbies were on their loveydovey period..anxious wasn't the word.. delirium.. is more likely. I went all dizzy with excitement to meet thee I adore.. soon it grows into devotion..
But after a while.. everything starts to wears off..
Probably it's just what i feel .. You're busy with your life. and I'm busy playing catch up with somebody busy enough to understand it all..

Do you know that It's tiring to play a waiting game ?
I'm exhausted.
I felt drained..
as if my life essence was sucked in to an endless whirlwind.

I am trying my best to enjoy my life.. But there's nobody to enjoy it with
I feel empty

It's been almost 4 years.. why the hell would i still be waiting?
I genuinely have no idea.. everybody think i'm crazy .. i'm a moron .. but I'd say I'm merely stupid..

I asked you.. do you still love me like it used to?
You said, YES, it's growing by day.. and as always, I smile and said "I Love you too"

But I'm sorry honey.. I can't restrain myself from feeling weary
I'm just emotionally incapable of playing the waiting game no more..

My patience is running thin..
no more hurt
no more pain

I'm exhausted..
really.. trully

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When it was all begin...

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